Tickle Me Coke Transport

From thesmokinggun.com

Hook Me Up, Elmo

OCTOBER 26--A Colorado drug operation hid large quantities of methamphetamine inside Elmo dolls, according to federal investigators who yesterday announced the indictment of 21 alleged members of the ring. During a year-long probe, Drug Enforcement Administration agents seized an Elmo doll (seen in the below DEA evidence photo) in Barstow, California that was stuffed with four pounds of methamphetamine. When investigators opened up the plush doll's skull, they discovered the drug stash inside wrapped in plastic (as seen in this evidence pic). While Elmo has never previously been linked to narcotics distribution or use, the Sesame Street character appears to have no teeth, which frequently is seen in heavy meth users.

The picture is quality.

Sigh...

It's kind of depressing to see that my last post where I wrote something was 13 days ago or something like that. I literally just haven't had the time to sneak anything in. At this new job I spent the better part of 4 months doing pretty much nothing. Over the course of the past 2 months everything ramped up, culminating in me working something like 112 hours in the last two weeks. Whatever. I like writing on this thing, and take some kind of pride in keeping it going. Things seem to have slowed down a bit now and I should be able update more regularly and frequently as plenty of crap is on my mind.

Today: Cursing Rowe's damn fantasy football team and Tatum Bell for completely choking yesterday. Also contemplating the excessive amount of laundry I have to do this evening while figuring out where I'll be enjoying Monday Night Football...thank god for the people that invented this as it makes the Monday work day just slightly more bearable.

Yesterday: I love my family and all, but I'll be damned if I ever do that again. My aunt and her family flew into DC from the Bahamas this weekend because she was running in the Marine Corps Marathon (For some sadistic reason she enjoys things like this) which was happening Sunday morning. My parents came down from Jersey to see her run/visit/take them back to NJ with them. I originally did not plan to attend said marathon, figuring it would interfere with my regular sunday habit of WATCHING FOOTBALL ALL DAY LONG, however, after one of my mother's whine/guilt sessions I ended up agreeing to go. Managed to trap "girlfriend" into going as well. One word describes this experience...clusterfuck. Driving into DC figured to be complete mayhem, so we decided on using the metro, and my mother decided she wanted to see my aunt at mile 20 and at the finish. A

fter and arduous metro trip to smithsonian where I led is in the incorrect direction for a few stops on a ridiculously packed train, we come out only to realize the mile 20 marker isn't particularly close to the Smithsonian metro stop, and that by the time we got there she had already passed it. Sigh...back on the metro to the Rosslyn stop, where the Finish Line Extravaganza was. I'd never been to Rosslyn Metro..i mean who goes on Orange Line to get anywhere, but I soon found out that it had one of those laboriously long escalators, which at the time of our arrival were not functioning. Needless to say, this wasn't a pretty sight with 34,000 families of 34,000 runners all trying to get to the same place at the same time. Finally made it up the stairs, only to find a bigger mess outside trying to get to the finish line at the Iwo Jima Memorial. Had to be around 60-80,000 people there, trying to squeeze over some bridge with a stupid stage on it with a crappy cover band. I didn't see my aunt cross the finish line..at that point I didn't care, I congratulated her, after cursing myself for being fooled into going.

Here's the fun part. Upon trying to leave the marathon area, we headed in the direction of the metro, only to be discouraged by the LINES of peoples just trying to get into the two metro entrances. I'm talking about 100ft lines of people just to get into the station. At this point I said no way in hell I'm taking metro back and began trying to procure a taxi. I'm unsure if this was a good idea or not, since it seemed other brilliant people had the same idea to to try grabbing a taxi. We started the process at 2:30 pm, after moving from location to location I finally frantically stopped a cab about 4 blocks away from Rosslyn Metro and begged him to take us to Silver Spring Metro...this was at about 3:45pm. Still not finished...in my haste to get everyone over to the cab before I was attacked by other frustrated travelers, my father dropped his cell phone running across the street. Fortunately it was picked up by someone..who lives in Alexandria, so I'll be picking that up sometime on Tuesday...NEVER AGAIN Marine Corps Marathon...NEVER AGAIN!

Tomorrow: Probably finishing my laundry, and picking my fathers phone in Alexandria after work. Then hoping "girlfriends" apartment doesn't have its heat turned to Slavery level.

Friday/Saturday: Seems Rowe is getting older or something, but the Borat Movie comes out then, and I'm sure we'll be in attendance. I think Klancer is also getting old, he might be turning 30, I'll have to get confirmation.

Now: back to work before lunch break

Soul Rebel - Lonely

This is my friend/past roommate/partner in crime's video for his groups new song, Lonely.

The link to their website is on the side of the page.

Denny Green blows a gasket....

...or whatever that means. I had to post this. Deadspin did already, but who cares.



This one is for the archives.

Mike Tyson...sigh

There isn't much more that can possibly be said about Mike Tyson. He's been written about, parodied, and just generally ridiculed for a good decade now. Doesn't change my memories of him when he was great, but sometimes it's just sad to see how far he's fallen. A few months back, I read an article describing how Tyson was basically putting on training exhibitions in crappy Las Vegas casinos to make a little coin. He owes big money to the government and others, and needs all the income he can get. As recently as a few weeks ago it was announced that he was going on a worldwide exhibition tour, taking on just about any fighter willing to go a few rounds with the former champ.

3 years ago I can remember half jokingly/half seriously telling my roommate (Mr. Spence) that Tyson would be fighting animals in the ring in 5 years. Today it seems like that notion isn't too far off. I glanced at this article this morning:

Ready to rumble: Tyson serious about fighting women on 'World Tour'

At a news conference at an Italian restaurant, Tyson said he would likely go just four rounds and that future stops on the tour might include bouts with women, possibly professional boxer Ann Wolfe.

When asked if he was joking about fighting women, Tyson said, "I'm very serious."

Honestly, what could you possibly say about that. The same guy who did this:



...could possibly end up fighting female boxers in the next year or so. My new prediction for Tyson over the last year is that he will be a greeter at the Circus Circus Hotel in Las Vegas in 5 years. But now I'm not sure he makes all the way out there...maybe the tropicana in Atlantic City. Sad to see...however, still somewhat amusing.

Politicians are Stupid

The sheer stupidity of some politicians is amazing. It's almost as if they are in a hurry to shove their foots in their mouths. I'm sure by now all of you have seen or at least heard about the Mark Foley Scandal. I'm not even going there...but this congressman made some comments in response...

Shays on Foley handling: At least no one died

"I know the speaker didn't go over a bridge and leave a young person in the water, and then have a press conference the next day," the embattled Connecticut congressman told The Hartford Courant in remarks published Wednesday.

"Dennis Hastert didn't kill anybody," he added.

Shays' comments recalled the Chappaquiddick incident, when Kennedy's car ran off a Massachusetts bridge, killing his passenger, Mary Jo Kopechne. Kennedy did not immediately report the tragedy, and he later pleaded guilty to leaving the scene of an accident.

My first instinct is WTF! However, I supposes this is par for the course with politicians. Was it really necessary to take potshots at Ted Kennedy? I mean for christ sakes its Ted Kennedy, no one in this country takes him seriously anymore. What was the point in that? Also what did you gain by saying "At least no one died", yes numerous teenagers were harassed (poorly) by Mark Foley, but you're right, no one died. Thanks. Dumbass.

T.O. Overdose Music Video

From Hank aka Billy Beige

I'm a cowboys fan...but I couldn't pass up posting this.

Honest Car Salesmen...NSFW

It's like a blog bonanza today...again, I laughed at this, so I posted.



P.S.: if there's someone that doesn't realize this...NSFW stands for Not Safe For Work.

New Energy Drink...COCAINE!

So when I was working at the radio station last year, my days were pretty long. Somewhere around 15/16 hours or so. I've explained that previously. However I neglected to mention my dependency on so-called "energy drinks". Right up the street from the studio was a 7-11 and almost everyday on the way home from the station I would stop and pick up 2-3 energy drinks. I rotated between Mountain Dew Amp, Sobe Adrenaline Rush, and the omnipresent Red Bull.

Up to that point I was under the impression that they had no relative effect, from previous experiences with them in college during my many failed "up all night because I never went to class and the final is tomorrow " cram sessions. They kept me just barely awake, but not enough to where I could actually learn anything. So when I started drinking them again for the radio station, I wasn't sure of the effect until the night I didn't get any, and struggled to make it home and almost passed out in the hallway. Unfortunately, well after my radio days were over, I was still drinking them, for no particular reason...just recently putting a stop to it.

Over the past few weeks I had heard about this new energy drink..Cocaine. Great name right? They have two taglines: "The Legal Alternative" Ha...and "Cocaine - Instant Rush. NO Crash!"


basically they are purporting that their drink 350 times more effective than Red Bull, and you experience no energy crash after drinking it (which I'm not sure how that's possible). With that kind of name, you figure there would be some public outcry as soon as it hit the shelves correct. Well it's already here.

"Councilman James Sanders Jr., a Laurelton Democrat, said he was shocked when constituents informed him last week about the latest drink hitting the shelves in New York City and Long Island. At a City Hall news conference, he said the drink's name and claims it contains a massive amount of "energy" send the wrong message to young people, who may think the actual drug was OK to use."

Now that councilman is obviously just trying to make a name for himself, which is fine that's what politicians do. Kind of a silly argument to make, and either case you should all get ready for the Cocaine rush, as I'm sure it will flood the market just like Red Bull did.

Cocaine Website

Cocaine MySpace Page

Stupid Quote of the Day

From Sohh.com

I have no idea whether this will be a regular thing...whatever...

...In related news, Diddy recently agreed to drop his Diddy moniker in the UK as part of an out of court settlement with English music producer Richard "Diddy" Dearlove.

"In the UK I gotta call myself P. Diddy cause somebody got the name Diddy," Diddy shared. It's just how the game goes. You have to have your name trademarked and if you come late in the game trying to get a name somebody already has, you gotta let them rock with it. Luckily for me I had numerous names so I was able to just switch over to one of the other ones."

-Sean "Puff Daddy, P. Diddy, Diddy" Combs

Unnecessary Censorship

I never watch Jimmy Kimmel, but this was funny...



**Update: I know McCoy posted this already, didn't realize til after the fact.

Status Report

Last Weekend: 50in LCD (The New Digital Goodness, as I'm sure it would be called if I was still living with 003) is working again, and I finally spent my first full Sunday of watching every pre game show (ESPN Sunday NFL Countdown, Fox NFL Sunday, CBS NFL Today) then the 1pm games (DAL vs. TEN...there we go 'boys, and SD vs BAL...no way the Ravens are that good), the 4pm game (JAX vs. WSH stupid ass Jacksonville, why is there a football team there). At this point up until last year I would be watching NFL Primetime with Chris Berman and Tom Jackson on ESPN, however when ESPN gave up the Sunday night game, they also gave up the rights to the 7pm highlights show. So instead I suffered through Football Night in America. Now I would question the longevity of such awful programming, but since NBC owns the timeslot, I see no end in sight. Without getting into too much detail, everyone on the show besides Bob Costas is awful, and Costas is better at baseball than football. Sigh. This lead into a good Sunday night matchup (SEA vs. CHI), which ended around 11ish. A 12 hour day of football...it's a wonder how I still have a girlfriend

This Friday: Seeing The Departed. I have to admit I'm more than mildly anticipating this movie. I like most of Martin Scorsese's work and the principal actors are intriguing. I've seen a few message board posts comparing it to Heat, and while I won't have my hopes up that high, I will have actual hopes for it, which is more than I can say for most of what I end up seeing.

This Weekend: Supposedly I get off for Columbus Day...never had it off at my old job, so this is new for me. Not sure what I will be doing, but I'm sure "girlfriend" will find some stuff for us to do (not a bad thing at all). Nothing like celebrating a racist pseudo explorer stumbling into land and killing all of its inhabitants, then becoming a hero. That wasn't how it was explained in elementary school now was it?

Last Week: Man I got railed at work, and the project I'm working A) isn't finished yet, and B) keeps changing. So if you want to have some kind of reason as to why this blog has suffered, call my boss. Leave a comment if you want her contact info.

Today: I'm splitting time working on my blog and doing actual work, as to appease "the people" and by people, I mean 9 people that read this blog. Also considering if there's anyway I can make money writing this slop.

More posts later today...